Helping your son thrive

Six simple ways to motivate your son

Setting goals can help school aged boys develop focus, confidence, and a sense of direction. Boys particularly benefit from goal setting as it gives them a tangible milestone to track their progress.

Dr. William Pollack, Harvard Medical School psychologist and author of Real Boys suggests that ‘Boys often need extra support to develop a sense of direction and purpose, and goal setting can be a powerful tool for them to feel capable, respected, and valued.’

Dr. Pollack highlights that goal setting gives boys a chance to experience success and failure, both of which contribute to emotional and psychological development.

Setting goals encourages our boys to recognise when they need support to reach their objectives, teaching them to build problem solving skills.

Whether it’s for school, sport, hobbies, or personal growth, having clear goals helps them stay motivated and work towards achieving something meaningful.

As a parent, encouraging your son to set realistic and achievable goals can make a world of difference. Here are six tips to help him get started:

Top 6 Tips for Goal Setting:

1. Start Small. Encourage him to set smaller, achievable (but still challenging) goals. This helps build confidence and keeps him motivated to keep going.
2. Set Meaningful Goals. It’s essential for the goals to be meaningful, personal and relevant. Goals need to be important to your son.  If they’re not valued, then forget it.
3. Be Specific. Goals should be clear and detailed. Instead of ‘get better at basketball,’ try ‘practise shooting 20 baskets every day.’
4. Create a Plan. Help him break down big goals into smaller steps. This makes them feel more manageable and less overwhelming.
5. Track Progress. Keeping track of progress helps maintain focus. Use a notebook or app to check off milestones as he reaches them.
6. Celebrate Success. Celebrate each achievement, no matter how small. Positive reinforcement builds motivation for future goals. Feedback is also important but for it to be effective it should be objective, useful and positive.

But what happens if he doesn’t meet his goals?

Failure is an inevitable part of life and an excellent teacher.

If your son feels like he’s failed at a goal he set for himself, it’s important that he knows it’s okay to feel disappointed or frustrated. Start by talking openly about those feelings and help him understand how to work through them.

Try refining the goal, perhaps his initial goal was too ambitious. Adjusting his goal based on what he learnt from not being able to meet it increases the likelihood of success in his next attempt.

The key is to stay positive. A positive attitude can help navigate setbacks and maintain his motivation.

When boys set goals and reach them with a little help along the way, they get to see how teamwork and working together can lead to great results. This experience shows them that asking for help is a strength, not a weakness, and an important part of learning and growing.

Brought to you by Brighton Grammar School